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Traces of Women Found in Mech

For years the desolate discipline has sat barren and secluded, populated only by robots and, possibly even less human, mechanical engineers.  A ground-breaking new discovery by the National Androphobic Scientists Administration (NASA) has uncovered traces of women in mech – evidence that the discipline may once have had full classes, or even binders, of women.  When asked about the news, mech student Ben Jackinov said that “for years, mechs have had no life – it is exciting to think that there might just be life on mech!”  The department has reportedly started teaching Cartesian graphing on an X-X rather than X-Y plane, in commemoration of the discovery.  NASA has even received a petition to rename mech to “the red discipline”; however spokeswoman Effie R. Mative-Aktonhyre has stated that “this would be inappropriate, period.”  She went on to explain that while the discovery is a great one, renaming the discipline would be a huge ovary action.

The search has not been an easy one.  According to Gall E. McOxbig, one of the engineers given the task, “none of us had ever seen a woman before – and when we did encounter women, the entire team had no idea what to do.”  Fortunately the project qualified for a large government grant last fall; McOxbig told The Toike that “the more funding we got, the easier it was to find women.”  When asked about future plans for his team, McOxbig reported that while “there’s still a huge load to be done”, his team has chosen to pull out of the project to refocus their research into chem instead.  He went on to cite a recent study promising nearly a 40% success rate across all disciplines, and explained that “it was the logical next step – women are certainly not going to be found somewhere way out of the habitable zone like ECE”.