University Becomes Free to Play

Developers of the popular educational system University, widely used among teens and young adults, announced on Tuesday that it will now be free to play. “Our aim,” added executive Al McMater, “is to make university more relevant to its target demographic.” In order to make this possible, the developers have introduced a new range of [...]

U of T Degree Speedrun Record Broken

A longstanding world record at our illustrious institution has officially fallen. Vietnamese student Miles Nguyen has become the fastest student in history to receive a 4-year degree from the University of Toronto, completing his Specialist BA in East Asian Studies in only 2 years, 3 months, 11 days, 5 hours, 2 minutes, and 36 seconds. [...]

Bankrupted Company Liquefies Assets

A Toronto-based corporation recently declared bankruptcy and liquefied the entirety of its assets, causing severe flooding along a narrow side street in the city’s financial district. Police have advised pedestrians to keep away from the area. The company in question, Foldman Stacks Ltd. and all its subsidiaries, had been experiencing significant difficulty in a troubled [...]

Early Bird Review of Armor in Next Skulerim Expansion

Latest Skulerim expansion, the Toike has managed to get its hands on leaked stats for every new piece of armor. With all kinds of game-breaking additions, this year’s iteration of The Elder Trolls franchise is sure to be a hit. Yellow Hardhat: Level 1 Armor -10 Sneak +10 Charisma +30 Engineering Magicka Dark Hoodie: Level [...]

PoGo Sequel Confirmed by Niantic

After the unprecedented success of Pokemon Go in recent weeks, it’s unsurprising to learn that their creators, Niantic, have already begun work on a follow-up version: Pokemon Stay. Niantic CEO John Hanke elaborated on the motivation behind the new announcement. “We’re going to take everything that we learned based on initial player feedback on Pokemon [...]

Dating Tips from a Dating Sim PRO

Too scared to talk to a girl in real life? Too broke to buy a dating simulator? Fret not, for I,xXx_pUsSy_sLaYeR_xXx, have created a comprehensive step-bystep guide on dating à la dating sims. The contents of this guide have been meticulously curated from my vast experiences of dating virtual girls, extraterrestrial aliens, pigeons, and World [...]

Super Meat Boy Receives Political Correctness Patch

For the first time in a long time, the indie classic Super Meat Boy is receiving an update to deal with political correctness issues brought up by Tumblr and similar social justice movements. In the official announcement, the game’s developers stated that hundreds of new playable characters will be released in the coming patch to [...]