Hey, gamers! If you’re like me, you’re gaming constantly when you don’t have school. Games (and energy drinks) are basically your lifeblood. But sometimes, there’s a game where something happens that makes you CRASH OUT, you know? Well for me, I’m pretty level headed. I almost never stop playing a game, yes sometimes I stop […]
As the world reels from the sudden passing of Marmalade from cancer this past summer, some critics have called into question his problematic behaviour. In addition to the many murders he committed, Marmalade frequently exhibited what is considered the behaviour of a “performative male.” A far more problematic pastime than any allegations of mole beheadings […]
Cats. Cats are some of the most incredible animals to have around. The feline form is incredible. From being able to land on all fours when falling through a great application of angular momentum through their tails, to their incredible senses. Cats have incredible senses in the dark, with great eyesight and tracking. Their eyes […]
*Pitter patter* meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow *rapid pitter patter* meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow MEOW MEOW MEOW MEOW MEOW MEOW MEOW MEOW MEOW MEOW MEOW MEOW MEOW MEOW MEOW MEOW MEOW […]
What is your favourite subject in school? What is your favourite colour? What do you like to do in your free time? What is your dream wedding? Congratulations! You’ve won a custom haunted mansion, how do you decorate it? And finally, what is your dream vacation spot? If you picked…. Mostly A: Count Dracula Count […]
Why don’t vampires like mosquitos?Too much competition. How do you kill a French vampire?You have to stab them with a baguette. It sounds easy, but the process is painstaking. Why don’t vampires use autocorrect?Because they love Type Os. What’s the difference between Jesus and a vampire?Where you stick the wooden stake. What do vampires drink […]
Your death in a past life! AriesYou accidentally wandered into a cult meeting and got ritually sacrificed. TaurusUnfortunately, you were fatally charged at by a bull. GeminiYou were rescued from being burnt at the stake by being turned into a vampire. CancerFor your crimes, you were hung, drawn, and quartered. LeoYou predicted your own death […]
Many are aware of the typical (boring) vampire, who is turned by a bite of a bat. However, there are many regional varieties of vampires endemic to Canada. These are far more interesting vampires with much higher salary potential*. Unfortunately, they come at the cost of getting bitten by some very different creatures in order […]
OHHHH BOYYYYYSYSYYSYSYSY FOLKSSSSS, Welcome to another article of “Random Recipes inspired by the Toike Theme that might work, but like also I have not experimented in any way so with this warning if your house burns down you can’t sue us because the warning is literally in the title of the series.” This week we’re […]
a Standard Operating Procedure (Rev. 1.2) by the Virgin Sex Columnist 1.0 Introductory Problem Statement Preliminary engineering observation shows that while couches exist in the Common Room, their potential as sexual activity-enabling infrastructure remains undocumented and under-optimized [1]. Students face a critical gap in opportunities for stress-mitigating intimacy. Attempts to fulfill this gap in alternative […]
