Wall:

By Donald Trump

Look at some of the most notable walls in history: the Great Wall of China, the walls of Troy, Carey Price, Wallberg, WALL-E. Do they have any illegal Mexicans? I didn’t think so, folks. This extremely efficient method of exclusion is a great deterrent for people trying to cross international borders, believe me. To date, the only things able to penetrate the aforementioned walls are Jackie Chan, a giant wooden horse, a knee injury, students transferring out of MSE, and a selfish film industry (seriously, where is the sequel to WALL-E?).

Walls are becoming more and more common in today’s society. The crooked media doesn’t tell you this, folks, but you’ll often see them connected to roofs and floors. Chances are, you are within walls as you are reading this. Even outdoors, walls are still prevalent… fucking fences!

The cost of creating a wall these days is yuuuge, approximately $20 billion. Sad! But hey, sometimes it’s not what you want to keep out, but what you want to lock in. We will make the faculty will pay for it.

Ladder:

By Armies of Isengard

Is a pesky wall bothering you? Well, there are few ways to get around it. You can go through it, but that usually requires a sledgehammer, a few beers, and an angry Bnad. You can go around it, but ain’t nobody got time for that. However, a much simpler option is to just go over it. Airplanes aside, ladders are incredibly useful for getting over walls. They are so damn cheap, so cheap, in fact, that with some beer, wood, and screws, you can make your own!

In today’s society, ladders are becoming more and more necessary as a method of elevating those who need to change lightbulbs or breach the defenses Helm’s Deep.

In the old days, terrible rulers used to try to protect their status by building high castle walls. In the face of intimidating structures, the siege tower was born. As the grandfather to the modern day ladder, corrupt kings didn’t stand a chance back then, and they sure as hell don’t stand a chance now.