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Local Rapper Signs Drake

In an unusual role-reversal, Drake has been signed by local rapper (and now producer) Dolla Dank$, a Ryerson University student during daylight hours. Sources say that Drake has already begun recording his next mixtape at Dank$’s studio in the heart of downtown Toronto.

“Man, we got top o’ da line shit up in here, man,” boasted Dank$ during a tour of his studio earlier this month. “Man, we got dat $9.99 Logitech microphone from Canada Computers right here, man, and professional soundproofing,” he said pointing to the walls and ceiling of the vocal booth, which were covered with pillows and egg cartons held in place by generous amounts of duct tape and (according to Dank$) swag. “And dis right here is where we edit aaaall our mixtapes,” he added, motioning to a fireplace nearby.

Drake has remained silent about the record deal and his plans since it was made official, but did give the press a typically-Drake (perhaps Drake-esque) dirty look at a recent press conference when asked about it. Drake Dirty Look exploded on Twitter, becoming a meme in less than 24 hours.