This monthly column features a riveting conversation between brothers Norman and Gordon McLuhan from Moose Jaw. This month’s column is about vampires!

Gord: Holy shit, Norm, that portal was crazy.

Norm: You’re telling me, I hope that haunted portal didn’t let anything weird into the world…

Gord: Yeah, I was just saying that to my friend the other day, you’ve met Count DeVille, right?

Norm: No? I don’t think I did?

Gord: I helped him moved in like a day before the portal closed to that spooky house down the street.

Norm: Oh nice, I guess I should go say hi.

Gord: Totally, he’s pretty cool, keeps weird hours though, if you wanted to go chat you’d have an easier time running into him in the middle of the night.

Norm: Man, I’ve been enjoying sleeping through the night after we dealt with the monsters that came out of that portal, I’ll have to see how that goes.

Gord: Yeah…Anyway, what were we supposed to be talking about for this issue?

Norm: It was vampires, right?

Gord: It was! Like bloodsucking, creatures of the night, don’t show up in mirrors. You know, Count DeVille didn’t have any mirrors, said they’re a “foul bauble of man’s vanity” or something.

Norm: Haha, almost like a vampire! Maybe we should get him to join us for this issue.

Gord: Oh yeah we should! He said we’ll have to very clearly state that we’re inviting him in if we have him over though.

Norm: Wait a second…