Apparently you can’t write about bestiality for the VSC column, even when the Toike theme is an animal (EngSoc is a bitch). So I am no longer the Virgin Sex Columnist, while we undergo litigation. Instead, I decided to become an independent relationship advice columnist by using my ECE skills to hack into the Editor’s inbox, and answer your burning questions on a scrap piece of paper shoved into each Toike issue.
Dear Verilog Slut,
Should I accept a job offer at AMD in the Markham warehouse as a “Digital Script Monkey Verification Frame Per Second Checker”? I don’t give a shit about GPUs, CPUs, NPUs, or UFOs, let alone testing them, but the guy I briefly had a crush on will be working on the same floor. Thanks, Chief Simp Intern
Dear Chief Simp Intern,
Simping can motivate you to do great things! Working for a company that makes the chips that makes AI possible is super cool! However, I’d be careful not to be reported to HR for inappropriate behaviour. Maybe consider working at Nvidia, Synopsis, or Intel instead. Lots of places to work on cool stuff without running into an old flame!
Dear Verilog Slut,
I’m having an issue with my ECE241 project and was hoping you can help (there’s hardly any documentation on this issue, or any of the drivers we’re using). Our VGA is stuck on one frame. What should we do? – Camping in the FPGA Lab
Dear Camping in the FPGA Lab,
I wrote a cumulative 4 lines of Verilog all of 2nd year ECE. I suggest you learn some project management skills and delegate work to your lab partner. Hardware needs one person writing HDL and debugging, and one person making a killer slide deck to sell your obvious failures as a success. I suggest you make the slide deck, and put your name first on it.
Dear Verilog Slut,
Are you going to try to set Zandrew up with someone to create new entertaining drama for ECEs?
xoxo,
Cupid-like
Dear Cupid-like,
Sure. Anyone who wants to be set up with Zandrew, the NPC lab partner, please write a letter to the editor explaining your qualifications and motivations, and include an updated resume and transcript. cGPA above 3.5 required!
