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Eng Sci Reduces Monthly Course Load to 420 Hours!

In a surprise move from the Division of Engineering Science, there will be a one-time-only reduction of monthly course loads down to 420 hours for all students. While they did not disclose their motives for the massive reduction, some are speculating this could be a response to the recent cannabis legalization. Many also think this could be an attempt by the department to win back student approval after quiz grades came back a day late. Whatever the motivation, though, many students were thrilled by the news.


The day the news was announced, there were many reported sightings of students crying tears of joy around campus. One could hear shouts such as “I just did the math and I’m gonna have 2.5 hours of free time A MONTH!” and “I think I’m gonna see my family!”


Not everyone was excited at the announcement, however. One student who would like to remain unnamed shared his feelings with us. “I really worry that we’re going to fall behind in our course work. The department is being blatantly irresponsible. They pulled this same crap back when 50 Shades of Grey came out for Valentine’s, reducing our weekly course load to 69 hours. Not a single graduate had a starting salary over $150,000 that year. Waterloo never does garbage like this.”


While there may not be much agreement on the course load reduction, everyone does seem to love the new mandatory email salutation “wake and bake y’all.”