Hey boys, I’m not like other girls. I’m a horse girl. But I’m not like other horse girls either.

Other girls wear high heels and dresses. I wear sneakers and jeans, unless I’m with my horse, in which case I wear nothing at all.

Other girls ride bikes. I ride horses.

Other girls hunt for sales in the mall. I hunt ineffective rulers for the good of my country.

Other girls start drama with their friends to get clout. I start wars with entire countries to expand the Russian Empire.

Other girls have sex with men, women and/or gender nonconforming individuals. I have sex with horses.