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Trudeau Proposes Blazing 420 Highway to Ottawa

Liberal leader Justin Trudeau has recently added to his controversial platform a proposition to extend Canada’s Highway 420 from the Niagara region to the nation’s capital.  It will be a joint venture between the Liberals and the Green Party.  The plan was cordially brought forward to, and was subsequently rejected by Conservatives across Canada, who called it a “pipe dream.”

The current Highway 420 connects the QEW with downtown Niagara Falls.  The existing speed limit is 80 km/h, and Trudeau assured our writers that the speed would remain “chill.”

The Toike Oike was granted an exclusive interview with Justin in his hazy office.  When asked about the purpose of the project, he stated that he wants to expedite the transportation of crops and “agricultural products” from Canada’s hot and humid Niagara Peninsula to the major centres of Ottawa and Toronto.  Ontario’s greenhouse industry has been rapidly growing over the past few years, and Trudeau wants to support this growth using the 420.

He noted that taxpayers will take a hit first, but their thoughts on the matter should relax with time.  The Liberal leader’s plan is for every Canadian to have access to the 420.

The Highway 420 extension is to be progressive in nature.  It will include an all-natural grass divider, which will function as a community garden to grow various flowers, vegetables, and other agricultural products.

There will be ON-Route snack stops for approximately every half hour of travel, and 7/11 is to be the official gasoline retailer along the route.  The highway’s emergency lanes will also be accessible to pizza delivery drivers, as Trudeau notes that they are an “essential service.”