Interviewer: “Good afternoon and welcome to the interview, how are you doing?”
Student: “∀ ε>0, ∃ δ>0 s.t. 0 < |x − 137| < δ ⇒ |420x − 69| < ε”
I: “What does showering mean to you?”
S: “If there exists a shower, then there must exist a 137 student who is failing 137”
I: “Did they brainwash you?”
S: “Get on with the interview, this is 10 missed minutes of possibly dragging up my mark by 0.01%.”
I: “You seem to be committed to your grade; what is your grade currently in MAT137?”
C: “Next question.”
I: “Wha-”
C: “Next question.”
I: “What do you think of the email sent on October 18th regarding–”
C: “‘EMAIL’?! Try BEING there yourself. There is NOTHING I could do to recover. It was… barely human…”
I: “Ok, sorry, jeez. On that note, the main point of the interview: why do you believe that you are saving the environment by not showering? Especially given… the previous circumstances…”
C: “See, it’s a very simple matter, actually. Not only do you save shampoo and water, but you also save time and energy! In fact, here is a rigorous proof. If you let–”
I: “I think that’s time! Thanks for the interview and good luck passing—oh my goodness, so sorry I just spilled my air freshener ALL OVER you! My apologies!”