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Issue: September 2017

Perfectly Human Elon Musk is Busy with Perfectly Human Cars

Posted on: September 24th, 2017

LOS ANGELES — Social media is abuzz today as noted industrialist and investor Elon Musk presented the state- of-the-art Tesla Model 3 at a corporate showcase yesterday evening. Stunning the crowd with his newest technological marvel, Musk utilised his “nerdy” charisma to the fullest by frequently referencing jokes whose punchlines cast him as an alien. Anecdotally, […]

Virgin Galactic Almost Ready to Commercial Space Travellers

Posted on: September 24th, 2017

Commercial space carrier Virgin Galactic has once again claimed they are “very close” to being able to o er their full body of travel services to customers. Admittedly, this has been reported as imminent every couple of years without any signi cant leaps being made, but CEO George Whiteside has assured skeptics that this time the […]

Transformers Review

Posted on: September 24th, 2017

After several years of product revision and company restructuring e orts, Cybertron Electronics nally delivers a line of quality products that hobbyists of all ages will enjoy. The flagship model, named “Bumblebee” delivers an extensive 60V output with an energy e ciency of almost 94%. While the AC output is kept clean by a top-of-the-line […]

7 ways to tell you’re in space

Posted on: September 24th, 2017

Life can be confusing, and today you’re having a particularly bad day: you’re afraid you might be in outer space without even realizing it. Luckily, The Toike Oike now has seven sure re ways to confirm that you are no longer on Earth. 1) You can’t breathe That’s odd. You’ve tried taking a deep breath […]