NYAN~ NEKO SUGAR GIRLS: AN ANIME FOR THE AGES
Nyan~ Neko Sugar Girls is an 11 episode anime Youtube series that ran from 2010-2012. It is rated 8.7/10 on IMDb. It was written, animated, and directed by SoapOpera46. It follows the story of two catgirls, Raku-chan and Koneko-chan, and their friend, Hitoshi-san, as the three of them learn to navigate love and the cruel [...]
Crewmate of Odysseus Found Dead
Evil Larry, known by many from brainrot videos on Instagram and Tiktok, has struck once again. In the early hours of the morning, one of the men travelling with the King of Ithaca, Odysseus, was found dead, appearing to have fallen from the roof of Circe’s palace. Elpenor (yes, pronounced like that), fell from the [...]
“Is the cat alive or dead? Until we look inside the box, they are in a state of being simultaneously both alive and dead.” Ok fucker, I’m right here and I can still hear you. So imagine my perspective: I was minding my own business, taking a wonderful nap on a couch. I had sprawled [...]
I Think My Boyfriend Is Secretly a Cat In a Human Costume
Over the course of the last few months my boyfriend has been showing many signs that they have been replaced by a cat wearing a costume of them. The first time I noticed this happening was about 6 months ago. I was sitting down and having my usual after work snack of cheese and crackers [...]
The Worst 24 Hours of My 9 Lives
The title says it all, I just had the absolute worst day of my life. I’m only 6 months old but I know it was a truly harrowing experience that I’ll remember for the rest of my days. At 8 pm, my humans fed my older brother, but not me. No matter how much I [...]
Pit Pussycat Party! Hey there Skuligans! I know everyone has been missing the Pit, no less me. My new home in SF3202 has been lonely without all of you there. I have decided I will visit the Myhal Arena next time there is SUDS to obtain sustenance but enough about me! It is time to [...]
Should Discord Kittens Be Allowed on School Servers?
Getting fucked in the ass by the labs in ECE344 (Operating Systems) is how I finally (spiritually) lost my virginity. While I initially took this course in a vain attempt to increase my employability, it’s clear that the only real benefit gained was a front-row seat in understanding the Discord kitten phenomenon present in this [...]
CatIT'S TIME TO FEED ME! Human ServantIT'S TIME TO SLEEP I HAVE A MIDTERM jumps up on the bed Mrrrow Meowww, meowww MEEEOWWWWWMEOWWWW, *smacks at the lazy human withpaw* Mrrrup! MMEEEOOOOWWWWWW MEEEOWWWWWW UhhhggghhghghNoo, it’s 4am, let me sleeepWait a couple more hours pleasee Why are you abusing me I just want to sleep Do you [...]
You Answered, We Asked: Verilog Slut Gives Relationship Advice
Apparently you can’t write about bestiality for the VSC column, even when the Toike theme is an animal (EngSoc is a bitch). So I am no longer the Virgin Sex Columnist, while we undergo litigation. Instead, I decided to become an independent relationship advice columnist by using my ECE skills to hack into the Editor’s [...]
Number 15: Burger King Cat Lettuce
Number 15: Burger King Cat Lettuce. The last thing you'd want in your Burger King burger is someone's cat. But as it turns out, that might be what you get. A 4channer uploaded a photo anonymously to the site showcasing his cat in a plastic bin of lettuce. With the statement: "This is the lettuce [...]
WE ARE SO BACK, I’M SO HAPPY WE’RE DOING CAT TOIKE. Welcome to another instalment of your favourite recurring series: Random Recipes inspired by the Toike Theme that might work, but like also I have not experimented in any way so with this warning if your house burns down you can’t sue us because the [...]
Industrial Engineers Host “Efficiency-thon” Over Reading Week
In a shocking display of productivity and misplaced passion, U of T’s Industrial Engineering students spent their Reading Week not reading, but optimizing the concept of Reading Week itself. Since my father (who I definitely have a loving and present relationship with) is an Indy 9T2, I felt compelled to cover this story. Dubbed the [...]
Are My Son’s Devices Making Him Dog-Like?
Hello everyone, concerned father here. Recently, my 7-week-old kitten was given a tablet by his aunt. While I didn’t mind it at first, it began to affect his character. He discovered an app called TikTok, and he spends all day pawing at his device, switching between all of the videos. Within a day, he was [...]
Why Cats is the Greatest Musical of all time
Cats is truly the greatest musical of all time, and I believe this with my whole heart. Nowhere else in the world can you watch 14 actors, who all claim they’re not furries, dress up as cats FOR MONEY. The plot: a young cat who at first doesn’t feel welcome, finds home in a hopeless [...]
Hi guys! I was directed to make an article in this newspaper to search about a recent incident I was involved in. I was walking down College Street, like any other day, when I noticed a small, orange cat on the sidewalk. Being a cat-lover myself, I stopped to pet it. However, to my astonishment, [...]
FOUR KITTENS IN MY HOUSE LOOK AT THEM!!! We haven’t even named them yet; they are the youngest cats ever. Look at how stacked they are! They love purring and playing with toys and wrestling each other <3
TORONTAIL, ONTERRIERO—Dogs of all ages have taken to King’s Farm to make their barks heard to the Government of Onterriero (for those that failed civics, the government is led by pigs, and consists of 124 Members of Porcine Parliament, or MPPs). The dogs are currently protesting to enshrine their God (Dog?) given right to be [...]
GUYS CHECK OUT MY NEW FAVOURITE CAT
okay guys check this out, this is the best cat i’ve ever seen and no one else can top it. his name is baby corn because hes just a small lil corn boy and has a vengeance for other corns. he’s a small wobbly cat with micro ears and he loves going outside, i saw [...]
He is a black cat,In a handsome tie, so cute,The best employee. Oh my god so cute,Napping cats are the sweetest,Lowkey I’m jealous. This cat is so long,I think it will reach the moon,What a brave kitty. Sitting with the catOn the cosiest blanketsIt’s the softest joy
There are many things out there that people very much like, And for many, a fluffy animal makes their day bright! But for some like me, you must be more wary than that, For I’m allergic to cats. Some own a cat, a companion in your home forevermore Some make a pilgrimage to a cafe, [...]
Games Rated By The Cats In Them
Stardew Valley: ♥️/10 There is a kitty. You can pet on kitty. You can water the kitty like a plant. The kitty can bring you gifts. Not too shabby, but also definitely not cat-centric. Also there is a limit of one kitty. Minecraft: Fish?/10 You can get as many kitties as you want and of [...]
Cats. Cats are some of the most incredible animals to have around. The feline form is incredible. From being able to land on all fours when falling through a great application of angular momentum through their tails, to their incredible senses. Cats have incredible senses in the dark, with great eyesight and tracking. Their eyes [...]
AriesYou will find an opportunity to foster a cat. You should take it. TaurusYou will adopt FOUR cats and they will all love you. GeminiYou should find that bonded pair of cats at the shelter and adopt them. CancerYou will get tons of money and spend it all on food and toys for your cats. [...]
What’s a cat’s favorite color?Purrple. Why are cats bad storytellers?They only have one tail! What's a cat’s favourite movie? The Sound of Mewsic! “If I lose all nine lives, send me to puuurgatory” - Chat Noir How many cats can you put into an empty box?Only one. After that, the box isn’t empty. What does the [...]
