Virgin Sex Columnist Three Years ago, u/TylerLife became a legend amongst men when he posted his story about his very particular song choice for bedroom activities. While the whole internet blew up criticizing his music choice, discussing how bad they perceived the song to be, however the glory of this man’s story only made me […]
Editor’s note: This article mysteriously materialised from the archives of 2010s Wattpad and is believed to chronicle a case documented extensively on the site in 2013. In another heartbreaking case of child human trafficking, a teen girl spotted hanging out with members of the boy band One Direction was found by paparazzi and internet sleuths […]
A new Hunger Games announcement means more activity in the fandom, and with President Trump Snow’s announcement for a new season of the Games, fans are showing their anticipation through their music taste. Following the announcement on December 18th, streams of Lucy Gray Baird’s popular song “The Hanging Tree” saw a 300% increase in streams […]
What type of songs does the new band Duvet play?Covers. What’s the difference between a piano and a tuna?You can tune a piano, but you can’t piano a tuna. What do you call someone who raps about women’s rights?Feminem. What do you get when you drop a piano down a mineshaft?A flat minor. How do […]
1. Which personality trait describes you best?a. Ruthlessb. Obsessivec. Try-hardd. HUGE Egoe. Chaotic 2. How many hours do you practice a day?a. 40b. 3c. Does playing the same four chords on repeat count?d. 2 (a week)e. None 3. How do you show off to the world?a. Play the viola better than a violistb. Look at […]
The song, “Pink Pony Club” is known for its use on the Toronto Blue Jays 2025 world series run as the walkup song for Davis Schneider, the mustache man. The song and Chappell Roan’s popularity come directly from Davis Schneider and when millions of people heard it when he walked up to bat. It was […]
Aries“Daddy Cop” from the Hit TV Show “The Rookie” Taurus“They’re Taking The Hobbits” To Isengard 10 Hour Version Gemini“Witch Pussy” by Clown Core Cancer“Pumpkin Cowboy” by Brian David Gilbert Leo“Don’t Fuck Your Coworkers” by Sailor Mel Virgo“Short Dick Man” by J9 Libra“There’s a Hair in My Donair” by BA Johnson Scorpio“I’ve No More … To […]
Dear Readers, I once again need to complain about women ruining my favourite game. And not just any women: pop stars. Not only have I been plagued by Sabrina Carpenter (as you may have already heard) invading Fortnite, but now she has been joined by the girls from KPop Demon Hunters. Can someone please set […]
I take a glancepast major chords, their happiness a malicious swarm,and I see you.I am awash in a heavenly trancefor I have witnessed Für Elise in human form. Imagining through the darknessthe sharpness to your jaw.It cuts through the flatnessof my dawn. When I gaze into your eyestime goes on ritardando.Calls to atone for my […]
As the resident Toike relationship guru, I tried. I tried so hard to find a compatible woman for Zandrew, my old NPC lab partner, in the hopes that we could pass on his superior academic abilities genetically. It would be such a shame if such a truly talented ECE died a virgin without siring offspring. […]
